You have enjoyed your years so far and sit in quiet reflection but changes happening to your mind promotes panic for resurrection. You want to tie your shoes and wash the car run up the stairs and then without thought carry a pile of stuff and run down those stairs again. Viewing other towns and countries on TV within your home gives a yearning to revisit places you were once so free to roam. Now all the fuss at airports and the long trek to the plane precludes a once world traveller from ever going abroad again. Pathos and unfairness brings on tears you try to hard to hide confused emotions spar with anger and you suppress the pain inside. There was a day when a beer fixed it all and conscience was something rare when all that mattered were results and thoughts of others weren't there. But treat yourself kindly old man you are entirely free to choose to forgive the way you lived before and stop hitting on the bruise.